The '68 Camaro Between Kenickie and Me (Pacifica Academy Drama Book 2) Page 17

  This round of guilt I couldn’t ignore.

  “I’m sorry,” I mumbled and went back to staring at the mess. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

  He was silent until, “Yeah, well, maybe I deserved it. Between last Saturday and Maddie…I’ve seen her sitting with you guys at lunch. I never thought she’d do that. And I don’t know what the hell she was thinking, telling Sloane about…” He sighed.

  Nothing he’d said about Maddie surprised me, but all of that didn’t help my mood.

  “I really wanted to send you a text,” he quietly continued. “To apologize. For that and last Saturday. But thought it would…mean more in person.” He paused, then said, “Natalie, would you look at me?”

  I so didn’t want to look at him, but gradually brought my eyes to his. They were full of the apology I heard in his voice. And way too much sadness.

  I hadn’t been expecting the real Shane today and didn’t want this Shane. I wanted hurt and pissed off at me Shane, and my defensive armor went up.

  “It’s fine,” I flatly responded. “It’s been super fun being around your ex this week.”

  He frowned. “It isn’t fine. None of this is fine. And I’m trying to apologize to you.”

  I shrugged. “Okay. Apology accepted. Are we done? Can we focus on this now?” I threw my hand out and toward the Greased Lighting materials.

  “What’s with you today? It’s like you’re about to explode or something.”

  That’s exactly how I felt, but I didn’t like him noticing or his sudden snarky tone. I snapped, “I’m fine. Thanks for asking.”

  “Stop saying that,” he snapped back. “And why didn’t you sit with Kassidy, Warren and your other club members at lunch?”

  “What club,” I muttered without thinking. Then mentally slapped myself.

  Now he would start asking questions I didn’t want to answer.

  “What does that mean?” he asked in a nicer tone.

  I started sifting through the materials—wood, metal, nails—like I knew what I was doing.

  All around us other kids were talking, laughing, working. Having a great time. At least they weren’t paying any attention to us. Our heated tension and words.

  “Natalie, what happened? And is that what Paige was talking about when you got here?”

  Of course he’d heard. But it’s not like she’d spoken quietly.

  I couldn’t get out of this, and stopped my sifting and sat back on my heels.

  “There’s no more club.” I crossed my arms. “We couldn’t save it. And Mr. Yates, because he’s supposedly still getting complaints, told us yesterday was our last meeting.”

  His face became dark. The darkest I’d ever seen it in our lightning brief time together. But why? A question so strong I had to ask.

  “Why are you mad? You have nothing to do with the club.”

  Hurt again flashed across his face, but his reaction didn’t make sense.

  “You’re right.” He sighed. “But I know how much the club meant to you.”

  I didn’t need or want his kindness and understanding. Not now. Not ever again.

  Shane Easton and that Natalie Carlisle were done.

  He took a deep breath and leaned forward. “Natalie, there’s something—”

  “I. Don’t. Want. To. Talk. Any. More.”

  He slowly sat back and kept his eyes locked with mine. Until he looked away. He then picked up papers stapled together and tossed it onto the Greased Lightning mess.

  “That’s what we’re building,” he said without emotion. “We need to start.”

  I silently released the air inside my lungs.

  Finally we were on the same page.

  As he started going through the materials, I started the countdown to the party. To officially letting go.

  Chapter 26

  I swallowed my third tequila shot with Daniel, Chad’s friend, new roommate, and my blind date, and coughed. At all the other parties I’d been to with Ella and Quinn, I’d never drank this much. Maybe a shot, then sipped a beer the rest of the night. Though I hated the taste of beer.

  But with each tequila shot I’d taken, the alcohol burned up one emotion after another. Guilt…anger…more anger. But not sorrow.

  The horrible hip-hop music and partying around us in the small kitchen, and that I heard coming from the first floor of the boys’ townhouse, started to become hazy. Almost dreamlike.

  I stood at the square island counter with Daniel. The sticky countertop held bottles of alcohol. Different types of juices. Cans of coke. And big red cups and empty shot glasses. The only other counter in the kitchen looked the same.

  Daniel had made a little space between us on the messy top for our shot drinking.

  “Again?” he asked.

  “Definitely.”

  He smiled at me before he started to pour two more shots.

  Not a terrible looking boy. But I didn’t like his hair. Too dark and shaggy. Not short, soft and…sandy-blond. I didn’t really like his eyes, the same color as his hair, either. They weren’t…San Francisco Bay blue. At least he was tall. But not as tall as—no.

  He handed over my glass, and I tried to return his smile before we drank.

  This time the tequila burning my throat didn’t make me cough, but the haziness in my head doubled. As Daniel looked me up and down. Again.

  I had the same shoe size as my mother and borrowed her black, Jimmy Choo sandals. She owed me for keeping my dog away from me. And the sandals went with my black, sleeveless ruffled dress. That landed mid-thigh and had a low neckline. I’d also flat-ironed my long hair. The only other thing I had on was my black crossbody phone case.

  I knew I looked like the…beauty queen my mother wanted me to be based on the way Daniel, and other boys at this party, kept staring at me.

  Daniel leaned down and placed his lips near my ear. “How are you feeling?”

  I shuddered. At his breath on my skin. And the thought of being someone I’m not.

  His heavy cologne mixed with tequila filled my nose and foggy head. But I gave him a plastic smile and said, “I’m great.”

  “Want another?”

  I should’ve said no. But I had to get rid of sorrow. “Sure.”

  While he poured us another shot, I swung my head left, right, but…didn’t see Quinn and Ella. The last time I’d seen them was during shot one. A group shot with them. Then Quinn and Chad left. And Ella left me with Daniel in the kitchen…in search of her own guy. Far from me.

  Daniel handed me my glass while giving me a lazy grin that made my flesh rise. He then tapped his shot glass to mine.

  I took a breath, drank, but this shot made me almost gag. And the ooonly thing I felt was…my fuzzy head spinning. “I think I should…shtop.” I shook my head.

  He laughed and pulled the glass from my hand. “So how long have you and Quinn been friends?”

  “Shince…we were twelve.” Soooo needed to stop drinking.

  “She said you’re really into college guys.”

  He moved closer to me and…slowly checked me out.

  Ickiness slid up my spine as I swallowed. To keep the tequila down.

  “But I can’t believe you don’t have a boyfriend,” he said…softly…in my ear. “The girls I went to high school with didn’t look anything like you.”

  I shuddered again at him and…his words…and leaned back.

  “Are you cold?”

  “No.”

  The hip-hop music sounded louder. I felt its deep…pulsing in my stomach’s pit. The voices and laughter all around us sounded like I was…surrounded by flocks of geese.

  “I need to…sit,” I carefully said. “I’m not…used to drinking like…this.”

  He put his arm around me, hugged me to him and we started walking. Into the music. Then there were stairs. A hallway. Voices. A dark room that became bright. The music sounded muffled. And we were suddenly on a bed and his hot, tequila-tasting mouth was on mine.

  Panic gri
pped my voice and stopped the spinning.

  But my stomach heaved as he ended up on top of me.

  Oh…shit.

  How did I let this happen?

  “You’re the hottest piece I’ve ever been with,” he mumbled against my mouth.

  I turned my head and did think of Shane. What he’d said to me on my birthday. In the car.

  His words from that day—his feelings for me—filled me with the power to grab Daniel’s hand and stop it from sliding up my bare thigh.

  “Get off me,” I said with surprising strength and clarity.

  Then my fight response fully kicked in. I tried to squirm out from underneath him, but he had almost all of his weight on me.

  “Relax, baby. I promise we’ll have fun.” He smashed his mouth against mine.

  I wiggled my hands between us, onto his chest and, with all my strength, pushed him up.

  “I said get off me!” I yelled and followed it up by kneeing him.

  Right where it would hurt the most.

  He yelped and rolled off me.

  I scrambled off the bed and, just to make myself crystal clear, kicked him as hard as I could in his leg. With my mother’s eight-hundred-dollar Jimmy Choo sandal.

  He moaned. “What the fuck’s wrong with you?”

  “You’re the biggest piece of shit I’ve ever been with.” I headed for the closed door while straightening my dress. And phone case.

  Once I was on the other side of his closed door, I paused long enough to take several deep breaths. To keep my tequila-filled head clear.

  I needed to get out of here. Now. Because I didn’t know what Chad’s friend might do to me if I didn’t leave. But first I had to find Quinn and Ella.

  I tried not to stumble, and ignored two girls waiting for the bathroom as I walked toward the stairs. I went down them as fast as I could in my unsteady, high-heeled feet.

  I scanned the crowded living and dining rooms for Quinn and Chad. Nowhere in sight. With my luck, they were in Chad’s room doing what Daniel had hoped to do with me.

  I wanted to empty my stomach at that thought. I’d have to brush my teeth until my gums bled to get the taste of him off my mouth. I’d have to burn this dress, too.

  What was I going to—that’s when I spotted Ella. In a sudden opening made by partiers heading toward the kitchen. She was on the couch and plastered against some guy with obnoxious biceps. I didn’t want to rely on her, but I had no choice. And maybe she knew where I could find Quinn and Chad. Though all of them would be pissed at me for us needing to leave.

  I wobbled toward her. I’d been so dumb to drink like that.

  But heartbreak and anger had made me stupid.

  “Hey,” I said to her. “I need to talk to you. Now.”

  She glared at me. “A little busy right now. What happened to that Daniel guy?”

  I looked over my shoulder to make sure he hadn’t followed me. No sign of him. Yet.

  “That’s what I need to talk to you about.”

  She made a big show of rolling her eyes before looking at her guy. “Save this spot for me?” she flirtatiously asked. “I swear this won’t take long.”

  He smiled and winked at her as she slowly pulled herself away from him.

  I took Ella’s hand and practically dragged her out the front door, into the night, and through a smaller group of college kids drinking outside. Still no sign of Quinn and Chad.

  She jerked her hand free from mine and stopped about a foot away from the door.

  Not nearly far enough for me.

  “What’s wrong with you now?”

  I ignored that and said, “Where’s Quinn and Chad? We have to go. Like now. Daniel’s a complete dick. He took me upstairs to his room and—”

  She laughed, and the sound chilled me to my core.

  “Can you blame him? Look at how you’re dressed.” She gestured at my dress and shoes. “And you started drinking the minute we walked into this place. What did you think he would want with you?”

  I stared at her, blinking, not sure I’d heard her right.

  “Ever since you got grounded, you’ve changed. And that stupid club’s changed you, too.” Her hazel eyes flashed with disgust. “You used to be like me. Kids at school would get out of your way when you walked down the hall. Now you’re one of them. A nobody. And I hate it.”

  I, mouth open, stood in front of her as my mind went blank from her visible hatred.

  She took a step toward me. “I also know you’re doing the competition with the losers in that club. You’ve been lying for weeks.”

  Oh…This is why she’d turned hateful bitch on me. But how did she find out? It couldn’t have been anyone in the club. Had she heard one of the boyfriends talking about it?

  A massive tequila headache started to form.

  “How...did you find out?” I asked, sounding weak and beaten.

  “Nothing at that school stays a secret.” She leaned forward. “How could you do that to me? You were my best friend.”

  Shane’s words to me from earlier drifted through my muddled brain.

  Ouch. Right for the jugular.

  “And now I’m stuck with Maddie Harrington.” She all but spit the words at me. “A drama loser who won’t stop whining about that asshole she wants back.”

  I squared my shoulders, but forced myself not to do something really awful and dramatic.

  Like slap the crap out of her.

  “But you won’t win the competition.”

  The hatred burning in her eyes stole the air in my lungs.

  “And I don’t know where Quinn and Chad are. Even if I did, I wouldn’t tell you.” She subjected me to the she-devil stare. “We’re. Staying. Here. You can do whatever the fuck you want.” She walked away. Right through the college kids who’d probably heard and watched us.

  I continued standing there. Staring at…nothing.

  I’d been friends with Ella Walker since sixth grade. Back then she’d just been snotty. Her nastiness didn’t really start until her dad decided to run for mayor over a year ago. I’d seen this side of her too many times to count and now knew what it felt like to be on Ella’s shit list. The guilt of standing by—glad she wasn’t lashing into me—and allowing her to treat kids at school like this covered me. Like I had put a heavy blanket on my shoulders.

  If not for the club, being grounded and Shane, I might’ve ended up like her.

  I turned from the townhouse and wobbled toward the parking lot. I had no other choice.

  I slowly picked up my pace—I had to get as far away from there as possible. But then the cool darkness made me shiver. The music and loud talking and laughter from the party and others in the complex sounded like I was in a tunnel. That’s when the reality of my situation—and every shitty day I’d had since walking away from Shane—burned my eyes.

  I blinked, and the tears fell and slid down my cheeks.

  I crossed my arms tight around my shaking body. Out of protection and to block the night’s cold wet air. I hadn’t…brought a sweater. I hadn’t planned…on being outside…longer than going from a car to…inside a house. Between my tears and exposed skin, I felt like prey…out in the wild. Alone.

  My heart began thumping inside my chest.

  How was I going to get out of this?

  I had one credit card for emergencies…but I’d left it in my purse. At Quinn’s place. I never carried cash—my shoulders shook as the tears fell faster and harder.

  I was…one of the richest kids at school and had…no cash for a cab. But I did have my almost fully charged phone. I’d had the sense to charge it up while we were…getting ready. For our first night out together…as best friends—I sniffed and swiped my nose with two fingers.

  I couldn’t think about Ella’s…cruelty right now. I needed to stop…crying…and focus on getting myself out of here.

  I, through blurry eyes, took out my phone. And I stumbled. My right ankle went sideways. I put my phone between my teeth and yanked the Jimm
y Choos off my feet. Once I was steady, I tucked the shoes under my left arm, continued walking and went into my phone.

  I couldn’t call my parents. I’d be grounded until I graduated if they found out about any of this. They were also at some fancy party at a hotel downtown.

  Who at school had a license and access to a car? And would drop whatever they were doing on a…late Saturday night…to come all the way down to this part of the city to get me.

  His face flashed through my mind. I knew he’d come get me, too. Even after how badly I treated him at community service and after. When I’d…left him and the start of Greased Lightning the minute my phone said noon. Without a goodbye or…backward glance.

  But I’d rather die out here by Lake Merced than have him see me…like this.

  I wiped the tears from my cheeks with the back of my hand.

  I scrolled through my contacts until I reached the K’s and my bleary eyes widened.

  Kassidy.

  She had her license—my shoulders dipped. Her dad was an ER doctor and they only had one car. But maybe she and J.R. were together? Yes. She had to be with him. And I knew he had his license and access to a car. He didn’t like me…not that I’d ever given him a reason to…but I had a feeling Kassidy could talk him into anything. Including driving all the way down here to get me. I only hoped she wasn’t mad at me for how I…acted yesterday.

  I stopped walking, chose her name, then begged the black sky she would answer. And she did. After several of the longest rings I’d ever waited through.

  “Hey, you,” she said, sounding friendly. Warm. And concerned.

  Good signs. But her warmth and friendliness refueled my tears. Because of how my ex-best friend had spoken to me. I also didn’t feel I…deserved Kassidy’s kindness.

  “I meant to call you to see if you’re okay. But I had a busy day today. I’m sorry.”

  I lost my voice as tears again streamed down my face.

  “Natalie?”

  I sniffed and said, “Hey, Kass. Are you and J.R. busy?”

  I heard a burst of laughter in the background. Which meant yes.

  “We’re at Bree O’Neil’s birthday party with a bunch of kids from school. Why?”